H index

2023-12

Since everybody has an H-index,

I wonder how they could sleep at night.

2024-04

Seems like every scholar has got an H-index ๐Ÿ“Š,

I wonder how they sleep at night ๐Ÿ›Œ,

When the citations come first ๐Ÿฅ‡ and the truth comes second ๐Ÿฅˆ,

Just pause for a moment and think ๐Ÿค”โœ‹.

Why is academia so intense? ๐Ÿซ๐Ÿ’ฅ

Acting so mysterious with their formulas and theories ๐Ÿง™โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ“œ,

Dark circles on their eyes ๐Ÿ˜ช and their labs so high-tech ๐Ÿ”ฌ๐Ÿ–ฅ,

That they canโ€™t even enjoy the simple facts ๐ŸŒป.

Everybody looks to their titles ๐Ÿ‘‘,

Everybody looks to their funds ๐Ÿ’ฐ,

Can you feel that? ๐ŸŽต

Yeah, weโ€™re playing the game called science tonight ๐ŸŽฒ๐Ÿ”ฌ.

Itโ€™s not about the grants, grants, grants ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ธ,

We donโ€™t need your grants, grants, grants ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ธ,

We just wanna make the world learn ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ“š,

Forget about the ranks ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ†,

Ainโ€™t about the, uh, impact, impact ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ’ฅ,

Ainโ€™t about the, yeah, papers, papers ๐Ÿ“„๐Ÿšซ,

Wanna make the world learn ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐ŸŽ“๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐ŸŽ“,

Forget about the H-index ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ“ˆ.

We need to take it back in time โณ,

When research made us all unite ๐Ÿค๐ŸŒ,

And it wasnโ€™t about patents and papers ๐Ÿ“‘๐Ÿšซ,

Am I the only one getting tired? ๐Ÿ˜ด๐Ÿ’ค

Why is everybody so obsessed? ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’”

Funding canโ€™t buy us happiness ๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ’ฒ๐Ÿšซ,

Can we all slow down and enjoy right now? ๐ŸŒˆโธ

Forget about the H-index ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ“Š.

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